In this episode, I dive into the topic of physical touch and its significance in our modern digitally connected world. I start by acknowledging the growing sense of disconnection that many people feel in today’s society, where human connections are often made through likes and follows on social media platforms. But what about the long-term consequences of this disconnected lifestyle? That’s yet to be studied. However, one thing is certain: we all need physical touch.
To shed light on this topic, I have invited Xandria Schaeffer on the show to talk about her work as a professional cuddle therapist. She offers a unique therapeutic service that provides nurturing physical touch and emotional support. Xandria explains that cuddle therapy is not considered sex work, although some providers do offer that service. Most therapists, like Xandria, focus on providing a much-needed place of comfort for individuals who are touch deprived or not receiving enough meaningful touch in their lives.
Cuddle therapy is a therapeutic type of service that offers nurturing physical touch, but we also offer companionship. So we offer both physical and emotional support.
Xandria shares her personal journey into the world of cuddle therapy, revealing how her natural inclination towards cuddling and the need to make extra money led her to explore this unconventional career path. She candidly discusses the initial challenges she faced, including the lack of training and the need to establish clear boundaries with clients.
We delve into the training and preparation required for a career in cuddle therapy. Xandria highlights the importance of learning about boundaries, safety, consent, holding space for clients, and being trauma-informed. She also emphasizes the need for ongoing support and mentorship within the cuddle therapy community.
We also address common misconceptions about cuddle therapy and its association with sex work. Xandria clarifies that while intimacy may be a part of some sessions, the primary focus is on providing comfort, companionship, and emotional support. She emphasizes the importance of maintaining professional boundaries and creating a safe space for clients to open up and share their struggles.

We also discuss the logistics of cuddle therapy sessions, including the locations where sessions take place. Xandria shares that she has two office locations and occasionally visits clients’ homes or hotels. She describes the cozy setup in her offices, complete with a comfortable bed, a TV, and snacks.
The conversation turns to the duration of cuddle therapy sessions, with Xandria mentioning the availability of multi-hour sessions, including an eight-hour option. She explains that these longer sessions involve breaks for meals, walks, and even watching TV together. Xandria also clarifies that while she may engage in outings with clients, she maintains professional boundaries and differentiates herself from an escort.
We address the issue of screening clients and ensuring safety in cuddle therapy. Xandria shares her multi-layered approach to screening, which includes a detailed code of conduct, a consultation call, and upfront payment for sessions. She emphasizes the importance of being cautious and aware of potential predatory clients, especially for newcomers to the industry.
Lastly, we discuss the demographics of Xandria’s clients. She reveals that the majority of her clients are men, although she does have a few female clients as well. Xandria explains that men often seek out cuddle therapy to fulfill their need for nurturing touch, but societal expectations and stigma may make it harder for them to admit their need for physical comfort.
In conclusion, this episode delves into the importance of physical touch in a digitally connected world and explores the role of cuddle therapy in providing much-needed comfort and emotional support. Through this conversation, we hope to foster a greater understanding and acceptance of the significance of physical touch in our lives.